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Tomorrow I go for my first of many doctors appointment. It will be me filling out a lot of paper work and all the lab work that needs to be drawn for the first trimester. WOW this pregnancy is going to take forever I guess when you “know” your pregnant cat conception you had an extra 3 weeks to add to your due date. Wha ti am feeling so far with this pregnancy? So so tired. I can sleep all day if the kids would let me. To bad they are way to loud and need lots of attention. I

The baby is a girl!!! Aubrey was sure of herself right up to the end, and she was right! Anthony was a little surprised, but happy… halfway there!

Sorry I never wrote anything about my doctor’s appointment… honestly, there really wasn’t much to write about. I filled out a bunch of paperwork and signed up for a blood study, so at each appointment I’ll donate about two teaspoons of blood. I swear they already took a TON of blood for all the lab tests. So far everything has come back normal, which is what I expected. Did you know that in the state of California you HAVE to do an HIV and Chlamydia test during pregnancy? It’

Our trip was great! The only downside was that I had to eat every two hours to keep from getting sick. So other than Anthony and Brad thinking I was a pig the entire trip, we had an amazing time. The ocean was so clear, warm, and beautiful. We spent at least twenty minutes every day out in the waves until they completely beat us up and we had to get out from exhaustion. I seriously have bruises to prove it. But riding the waves on our little Costco body boards was so much fun

After having six kids, my tummy is definitely not as strong as it used to be. So if you see me and think I look 16 weeks pregnant out of nowhere… I’m not. I’m only 5 weeks. I guess this is my way of announcing that I’m pregnant. I know I’ve gone back and forth about having another baby, but honestly, the reasons I kept hesitating were selfish ones. Deep down, I really felt like there was one more meant to be part of our family. So… we just went for it. And it happened so quic

I’m sitting at my friend Bernie’s house waiting for my hair dye to kick in while she picks up around the house. She does my hair every six weeks because my hair grows insanely fast, but this time we decided to do highlights for summer and see if it stretches the time between coloring appointments. My gray comes in FAST. It’s funny — on my TikTok and IG (@durstfamilychaos), someone commented that I’d look ten years younger if I dyed my hair, and another person said I looked li

Writing this blog has really made me sit back and contemplate my life. Like… how did I even get here? How did all the big things and little things shape who I am today? The stuff I went through growing up, the people I loved, the people who hurt me, the choices I made, the trauma, the survival mode, the depression… all of it made me into the person I am now. And honestly? I think one of the biggest things I’ve struggled with my entire life is being a people pleaser. Trying to

I don’t know what it is—every time I sit down to write about our life, the baby starts crying. I just sat down, and sure enough, he began to cry. Luckily, Anthony is home now and was able to take him off my hands for a few minutes. The past few weeks, Anthony has been busy working on a “big” project, which left me home alone with the kids from 5 a.m. until around 1 a.m. Those were very long days, but thankfully the project only lasted eleven days. As exhausting as it was, we

He is home! We were able to pick him up today (Sunday) at 9 a.m., although computer issues ended up delaying our discharge until around noon. It was a long wait, but I’ve learned a lot of patience through this journey. I was so grateful to have my aunt and sister here helping with the kids during that time. The last two days he was in the NICU also gave me something special—I was able to spend one-on-one time with each of my other children, really talking with them and bondin

Last night was the first night I’ve slept at home in a week. I thought I would be able to rest, but I kept hearing the baby’s oxygen machine beeping in my head—baby is still in the hospital, but my mind just wouldn’t let it go. I did wake up at 9 and called the NICU. He was feeding at the time, and his next feeding was scheduled for noon. About 45 minutes later, I got a call from the NICU saying Sammy was still crying. He had already eaten 3 oz but wouldn’t settle or fall asl

I went to the hospital to show my aunt the baby, and when I got there, the nurse was trying to call me because she wanted to feed him an hour early. He wasn’t even awake yet. I was just glad we went in early so I was able to feed him. While I was there, I also spoke with the doctor, who said Sammy is doing much better and they are now working on weaning him off his C-PAP. All of his labs have improved, and his lungs are looking better. They’ve turned him down to a level 3 on

I find myself feeling torn between two families right now. My sister and aunt came in from out of town to help with the kids while I make the constant commute back and forth between home and Kaiser. I’m so grateful for them, but honestly, once I get somewhere and finally sit down, I never want to leave again. When I’m with Sammy, I just hold him and cry. I keep wondering what is really going on inside his tiny little body and if there was anything I could have done to prevent

News update for baby Sammy: I’ve been going back and forth between home and the hospital to feed the baby in the NICU. Honestly, I’m practically living there right now. I come home long enough to shower, eat, and let Anthony spend some time with the baby while I spend an hour with Aubrey, who is having a really hard time with all of this, before heading right back. Since Sammy is only nursing, the hospital has allowed me to use a boarding room for the next 72 hours. I’m reall

This was written very fast, so I know there are probably still lots of errors… but here is our birth story. Labor started Wednesday morning. I had a really bad contraction followed by bleeding and all the other fun things that come with labor. My contractions were only about 10 minutes apart, so I spent most of the day in bed. Anthony still had important work things he needed to get in order, and honestly, I didn’t want him to come home until he absolutely HAD to. Later that

I really thought for sure that by the time soccer season started, I would already have this baby. I guess I was wrong. Devun had his first soccer meeting on Thursday, and practice starts this Tuesday. He’ll have practice three days a week. Zack has his meeting on Tuesday, and I’m still not sure when his practices will begin. Marissa was supposed to have a meeting last week too, but most of the kids were out of town, so they decided they’ll just talk after the first practice t

Just a few minutes ago, while I was editing photos, Sam came downstairs and asked me what other names we had considered naming him. I pulled out the journal I had printed and started flipping through it with him. I couldn’t believe hJust a few minutes ago, while I was editing photos, Sam came downstairs and asked me what other names we had considered naming him. I pulled out the journal I had printed and started flipping through it with him. I couldn’t believe how much histor

After class, I talked to my coach, and she recommended more protein and fewer carbs. So that’s the plan starting today. I already had my eggs this morning, which is saying something because I NEVER eat breakfast. But anyways… that’s not really the point of this post. I was talking to my friend and neighbor on the drive home from the gym. She takes me every day, and we were both saying how almost insulting it feels when doctors label us as “obese.” We’re trying. We’re working

My sister called me today feeling nostalgic, or maybe just remembering the trauma we both spent years trying to bury. She laughed and said she would give me $1,000 if I could remember the name of the movie we saw when we were about 11 and 12 years old — back when we lived in Reno and our mother.. Why was this tramatic ? Well, our mother never came to pick us up from the theater when the movie was over. The memory came back in pieces. We wanted so badly to go to the movies, bu

Anthony had to go into work today to deal with a problem, but before he left, we still managed to squeeze in our Saturday morning walk together. When we got home, I spent about an hour editing photos before heading to the gym. I ran for 30 minutes and then rushed home . Once I got home, I opened all the blinds and started editing again. Last weekend I spent almost the entire weekend working, and I didn’t want another weekend where I felt like I did nothing with the kids. So I

I was born on October 6, 1980. My mother was Laura Elizabeth Evenson. My father was unknown — although the rumor was that his name was Allen Smith. My mother was only 18 years old when she had me. She wasn’t married, and for the first year of my life, I lived with my Grandma and Grandpa Evenson. When I was about a year old, my mother married Ronald Bailey. Nine months later, my half-sister Alicia was born. My mom always joked that Alicia was their honeymoon baby… although, ho